I did not grow up in the church or with really any understanding of God. I didn't find Christ until college. This means I went almost 19 years without knowing the love and grace that God has for me. I find that for some of my Christian friends this is a little hard to truly grasp. They have all gone through periods where they felt distant from God or were making choices that they knew would interfere with their relationship with God. Some even out right turned their backs. But I simply never knew him. I never knew that I was fearfully and wonderfully made. I never knew that he loved me just the way I was. I never knew that despite my many flaws and failings, he sent his only son to die so that I could have a personal relationship with him forever. I had no idea.
This caused a lot of loneliness, a lot of gratification seeking. and a lot of destructive choices. But ever since I accepted Christ as my Savior, my life has been completely different. I have been completely different. It wasn't an overnight transformation and there were major periods of regression, but I could never imagine going back to the person I was.
Because I know what it's like to live on the other side, and to not know Christ, it has always been imperative to me to teach my son about God from a young age.
I wanted to share with you some things that I do in my parenting to help teach my son about God and to encourage that relationship. I also want to share with you some things I don't do, because I feel that those would do more harm than good.
God always loves you
For me this is fundamental. I want my son to understand that God cares for him, and that when he falls short, his heavenly father will forgive him. When I tell him I love him, I remind him of all the people in his life that love him, including God. And that God, just like mommy, will always love him no matter what.
You can always talk to God
When I pray with my son (and honestly, even when I pray by myself) I use simple words and sentences, because I want him to feel comfortable talking to God. I want him to know that prayer is really just a conversation. I remind him that he can talk to God about anything, something interesting or something exciting or something scary, and He will always listen.
God created all things
I probably spend the most time on this one right now because he's young enough to still be incredibly amazed by nature. When we're at the zoo or in the garden or taking a walk I remind him that God made everything. God made the plants. God made the animals. God made the sunshine. Sometimes, if it seems to have piqued his interest will stop for a moment to say a prayer of thanks to God for making those things.
Like I said, there are also some things that I don't do. Some of them are because he's still so young, and some things I never will do because I feel it does more harm than good.
I don't make him sit through service
Before everyone gets deeply offended by this line of thinking, allow me to explain. When he was an infant I always took him to service with me. He would nurse and sleep most of the time. As he go older (and mobile) getting him to be reasonably still and quiet became quite a challenge and frustration for both of us.
Although I wanted him in service with me (mostly because of my attachment issues) I really had to step back and take a look at the bigger picture. What was I trying to accomplish? We attend a large church that has an amazing children's ministry and such a large number of children that they are able to have a ministry specifically for each age group. More than anything I did NOT want church to be a chore. We all have to do things in life we don't want to do, but I didn't want our time in fellowship to be one of them.
So when we get to church I give him a choice (because 2 year olds love choices) he can come in and "sing songs" with me, which is how he refers to worship, or he can go play with his friends. Typically, he'll opt to come into worship with me, stay for about 30 minutes, then asks to go to the kid's room right before the sermon starts.
This works really well for our family. He's always excited to go to church. He gets to participate in worship time with me because he wants to. And he gets to see that this is an important time for me and for all of the adults in our congregation. As he gets older, we might do things a little differently, or we might not. And that's not to say that it is wrong if your young children sit in service with you. That's just what I do to best accomplish the spiritual goals that I have for my family.
I don't teach him about commandment and obedience to God...yet
He's so young, that the concept that there's this unseen being who's always there and listening to him is hard enough. If I make Him a score keeper, then that can sound pretty terrifying to a child.
More importantly, it distract from the thing that I really want to draw attention to, which is that God is love. As he gets older we'll talk more about the way that God calls us to live our life, but just not right now.
I don't tell him how to pray
I've seen lots of cute kid's prayers and memory verses for little ones, and I think that's nice, but if my son is going to build a relationship with God, I want it to be genuine to him.
We do talk about the kinds of things that are good to pray about. We should thank God for things he created like food and sunshine. We can talk to God when we're upset or need help. I also model pray. He listens to me pray and other adults in his life.
And I also never make him pray. When I give him the opportunity to pray with me, he usually takes it, but if he doesn't that's okay. When he does pray, what comes out often doesn't quite make sense, but I can tell it's whatever is on his mind. I love this. I think it is beautiful. He talks to God the way he talks to any other adult in his life. I love this because I want him to know he doesn't have to filter his relationship with God. He doesn't have to hold back. He doesn't need a script. No matter what it is, good or bad, I want him to know he can offer it up to God.
If your family does things differently, that's fine too. If you're happy with the results, that's all that matters! If you're feeling a little stuck or looking for some inspiration, I hope this helps.
Blessings.
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